So we were suppose to leave at 8:30 this morning for a 9:30 arrive time. At 7:45 the clinic rings up and tells me we were moved up to a 8:50 arrive time. I start freaking out because the clinic is 1hr and 15 min away. I go up to tell dh and he is still in his pj's and he freaks out even more saying "this isn't good, blah blah blah". Luckily I was still on the phone at this time so the nurse tried reassuring us that it has nothing to do with our embryos, just some people ahead of us got bumped to a day 5 so they moved us up.
However, this is what IF does to you. After you deal with so much bad news happening you mind automatically goes there. There is no happy carefree cycle. We go into ivf with the fear we will be cancelled each day and if we do make it to ET that the embryos won't stick and even if they do, that the pregnancy will not last. It is hard to think differently when we have experienced all 3 of these scenios.
I was watching Sister Wives yesterday on demand (since I miss it Sunday nights when it is on). This is my one dirty secret show. Anyways, the first wife suffers from IF. It took her many years to conceive the first time, and then has had secondary infertility for the past 16 years (with one m/c thrown in there as well). The other 2 wives that joined a few years later each gave birth to 6 kids and then their husband married 2 years ago and the new wife got pregnant 8 months later. When she gave birth she offered to be a surrogate for the first wife if she wants to try for another baby. So anyways last week's episode shows the first wife and the man going to Mexico for her birthday and anniversary, but he had planned all along to ask her to make a decision about pursuing fertility treatment. It ended with her saying she didn't know what she wanted to do. None of the other wives can understand this, but being a fellow IF I can easily see Meri's point of view. She just turned 41 (which isn't good in itself in the fertility world), has a daughter that is almost done highschool, and though she would like another baby I don't think she wants to start the whole baby process all over again at her age. But more importantly, I think it is because she is scared. She is scared of ivf not working, or if it does work that she will lose another pregnancy. And unfortunately given her age these things are very likely to happen. Having the new wife be a surrogate will not change anything since that likely isn't the IF issue. You are still dealing with 40 yo eggs and ovaries. However the younger fertile wife doesn't understand this and thinks if she offers her womb that it will make everything better. Really unless you walked the IF shoes it is hard to understand.
Anyways, getting back to my transfer today, everything went well. Since dh came I was able to take the valium which helped big time. Basically it made me feel whoosie which helps take your mind off of the whole process. Our embryos were: 8 cell A quality (A is the best, D is the worst), 6B, and 6C.
We transferred the 8A and 6B. I was very pleased especially since it wasn't 72 hrs yet from fertilization. To compare, last cycle I transferred 2 6B's and it was a bfn, but my twin pregnancy was from a 7A and 6B and they both struck so so far this has been my best embryo report. I think if any sticks it will be the 8A because that is basically a perfect day 3 embryo. Unfortunately the picture they gave us sucked. They didn't zoom in so the embryos looked so tiny and it was also blury. Not really a prize first photograph.
Now I just have to sit and wait and hope these two continue to grow, hatch and then implant. I go for my beta on July 5. Not quiet sure what I am going to do on the 4th yet. I should know by then by hpt what the result is so it is pretty nerve racking.
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